wychwood: Trip staggering (Ent - broken)
First day back at work fairly whizzed by; between catching up with email, Teams messages, and the spam queue, redoing and circulating all the team monthly reports because it turned out we didn't have any data for 30 or 31 October when I did them, and my interim PDR I was fairly bushed by the end of the day. The PDR went well, but was quite intense. Then I staggered off to my singing lesson, but surprisingly was somewhat revived by Schumann, who is not normally that inspiring for me.

Then I came home and tackled a pile of evening tasks. The cleaner is coming tomorrow, and I had an accumulation of things in my to-do list that I hadn't got to. There's still quite a few left, but I have least ordered the things I wanted from Boots. Or Miss H did it for me, at least, after a catalogue of disasters including six successful orders cancelled immediately after I placed them, Paypal getting into a loop where I had to input a 2FA code in order to be shown a captcha which then told me I had completed it successfully and hung indefinitely (at least three times), attempts involving two payment methods, three computers, two different web browsers, on multiple days... all of them identically unsuccessful. As I said despairingly to Miss H, I just wanted to buy some insoles, how could it possibly be so hard.

It worked fine for her, anyway, and I've paid her back so soon I will have my spare hot water bottle etc.

And on that note of triumph I am going to transport myself to bed where hopefully the current hot water bottle will have made everything lovely.
redbird: closeup of me drinking tea, in a friend's kitchen (Default)
I just had a phone appointment with someone, funded by the state of Massachusetts, to help decide between basic Medicare plus a Medigap plan, or a Medicare Advantage plan. I have gotten some useful information, but am going to double-check everything, because in at least one case what she told me contradicts what the official Medicare.gov site says. It's a relatively minor point--the existence of a roommate discount for some Medigap plans--but I asked about which plans it applied to, and she said it doesn't exist.

The new and interesting information is that apparently, because I am under 65 and disabled, I'm eligible for a Medicaid plan, without an income limit. It's called CommonHealth, and seems to be part of the state's "Commonwealth Care." If I understand correctly, after Medicare paid 80% of a bill, it would cover the rest, but only at providers that take MassHealth.

If I got basic Medicare (parts A and B), a part D drug plan, and a Medigap plan, I could see any provider that takes Medicare, without worrying about what's in-network. However, a Medigap plan would cost significantly more than this CommonHealth thing.

Or, I could sign up for another Medicare Advantage plan. The advantage there is there are some that would cost no more than the Medicare Part B premium. The disadvantage is being limited to in-network providers unless I'm willing to pay significantly more for that service.

I thought the question was, is it worth $250-$300/month (Medigap + prescription coverage) more to not have to worry about being in-network and prior authorization. It sounds like this CommonHealth plan would cost significantly less per month, but if the provider doesn't take MassHealth, I'd be paying 20%. Which gets back to the larger problem that there's no way to find out what number that will be 20% until after the visit.

If I understood correctly, all these options have copays for some things, and CommonHealth may require prior authorization for some things.
james_davis_nicoll: (Default)
2022: The British are heartened by Partygate revelations that the Tories celebrated in trust the gatherings barred to the rabble during Covid, the UK teaches the world a thing or two about political stability by going through three Prime Ministers in less than two months, and Queen Elizabeth II escapes the prospect of discovering how exactly the UK would continue its downward political arc.

Poll #33843 Clarke Award Finalists 2022
Open to: Registered Users, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 20


Which 2022 Clarke Award Finalists Have You Read?

View Answers

Deep Wheel Orcadia by Harry Josephine Giles
0 (0.0%)

A Desolation Called Peace by Arkady Martine
20 (100.0%)

A River Called Time by Courttia Newland
0 (0.0%)

Klara and the Sun by Kazuo Ishiguro
1 (5.0%)

Skyward Inn by Aliya Whiteley
1 (5.0%)

Wergen: The Alien Love War by Mercurio D. Rivera
0 (0.0%)



Bold for have read, italic for intend to read, underline for never heard of it.

Which 2022 Clarke Award Finalists Have You Read?
Deep Wheel Orcadia by Harry Josephine Giles
A Desolation Called Peace by Arkady Martine
A River Called Time by Courttia Newland
Klara and the Sun by Kazuo Ishiguro
Skyward Inn by Aliya Whiteley
Wergen: The Alien Love War by Mercurio D. Rivera

If I say I did not hear of something, it means that it is new to me. Did I not at least glance at the Clarkes in 2022?
conuly: (Default)
"It's set in a time when things were hard for black people in America" - a line which so flabbergasted me that I don't think I ever figured out what to say.

But this one may have topped it!

"The story is about a black girl, somewhere between 8 and 16 years old, from a black family."

...I'm dying to ask why they think they need to specify that this girl is the same race as everybody else in her family, when that's usually how this works. There's no indication in the rest of the post that we might have reason to think she's not.
After playing phone tag I got the sleep study sorted out, seems they could change my pickup day to a friday and I dont have to drop it back off until monday, which they should have just done when I made the original appointment, but,...nooooo.... sigh.

Skin still healing up, but I do have one post injection side effect I need to chat with doctors about, its really only an event that happens once, 2-4 days after the injection. Or maybe I have delicate hemeriods. who knows.

Van goes in on the 24th, so far my insurance company has assigned liability to the person who hit me.

My allergy appointment was a colossal screw up, I wasnt sure what to expect, but, setting a low bar helps. Turns out that I was supposed to have a consult prior to this appointment, which I didnt, and I was to stop taking my antihistimines for 7 days. the test they were to administer was to put me into anaphylactic shock. When I was offered the do over, I declined, since I have heart issues now, and the not quite really diagnosed lung issues. Two of the major things with having a reaction is either to have a heart attack or stop breathing. so again, a very definate NO. getting tired of this.

Still having the erractic sleep issues of no sleep;, or lots of sleep.

I have been getting more reading done, which is a very nice things.

Went to see Nuremberg with my niece. I was impressed with it, the cineamtography was amazing, Russell Crowe was the epitomy of entitled banal evil, and the entire movie was well done. Yeah, there were some hollywood moments in there, but it was a historical moment in time.
james_davis_nicoll: (Default)


Alien invasion and the local Nazis complicate Pelham "Rat" Garfield's simple dream of being a successful pimp.

A Sweet Sweet Summer by Jane Gaskell

just having help

2025-11-16 08:55[personal profile] prixmium
prixmium: (rose tyler - series 1 pink)
One of the things I often lament in my life is how rarely I have help for anything in particular.

My mom had a physical disability that made her mobility somewhat limited, but for much of her life she was also a pretty thorough and compulsive housekeeper. This resulted in a lot of my childhood being this pendulum swing between being given chores that I was mostly just supposed to figure out on my own entirely or not knowing how to do certain chores at all because one or both of my parents thought it was simpler to do it themselves than to teach me how. This led to a lot of weird resentment toward basic household chores that I think could have been avoided if I had been taught the responsibilities in ways that were less "figure it out, you should know this through observation," or just having it done for me until suddenly that wasn't possible anymore.

My parents were good and doing their best overall, but it is something I have realized as an adult and had to think about a lot as I figure out how to exist in a space where if I don't do something for myself, it doesn't get done.

Even as I was getting older and my mom was getting weaker, whether she was sick yet or not, it always brought me an incredible rush of feeling loved if anyone just volunteered to do something for me. I can't remember if it was the year she died or sometime before, but I remember being at home with mom and not feeling well for some reason or another, and she offered to make me a sandwich. It really moved and surprised me, because my parents at some point kind of stopped doing small things for me like that, even though my mom did my laundry for an absurdly long time. (It was not even really me being lazy; it was that my mom didn't want individuals splitting up their laundry by person rather than by type.)

Now, I live on the other side of the planet from anyone who actually loves me. I get along with some friendly-at-work people, but none of them is close enough to me to ask to hang out independently of work-related group events. One of my coworkers tried to start a D&D thing at work, but we did it exactly once and then basically gave up on ever trying to do it again because of the fact that, after that, we found that there were such frequent random extra weekend obligations at work that none of us had the clear time to do it anymore.

I don't have it confirmed, but I think that coworker might be moving on again next year. At the very least, I think she is kind of disillusioned with my workplace.

I can see why some of my coworkers are, but at the same time, this is the least-bullshit job I think I have available to me at the moment. Will have to see where things land in April, I guess, unless something weird happens before then.

Yesterday, I had to go into work for several hours for those parent-teacher meetings I'm mostly useless in. A couple of the parents spoke English and asked me a few questions, but it felt like it was mostly a courtesy to me at the end for having sat there during the Japanese conversations.

Today, I had a lovely lady from a Sisterhood Japan group on facebook come over and help me with cleaning my apartment more thoroughly than it's been cleaned in months. It's not that it was completely disgusting, but it was dusty and cluttered, and I just did not know where to start.

I don't have any official neurodivergence diagnosis, and I'm not even sure it's an nd symptom, though I've read about it as such, but I find that I get really stuck on doing menial tasks that aren't daily-maintenance stuff (like hygiene or dish washing etc) if I am all alone. While the lady was here, I let her do most of the actual cleaning, but so as not to be an awkward lump or waste the time or be rude by, like, playing video games while she's working, I organized my closet a lot. Unpacked some winter and fall clothes I had brought here in August and stuck some stuff that's too summery into the vacuum pack bags I had the former in.

I paid this woman, of course, but it felt like it was a mutually beneficial situation. She got paid, and I got the companionship, more than that, the soothing balm of having anyone care enough to do something well for me. I know she did it for money, but she was really kind about it, and I know that the whole love languages thing was really just a conservative Christian dude trying to justify why men need to be waited on hand and foot and to have their wife play mom at all times, but it really does feel like meaningful assistance is something humans need, both to receive and to give. I do try to give it, in work and in personal relationships, in the ways I know how, but one of the reasons I feel like my emotional well runs so empty sometimes is because I don't have anyone to ask for help when I need it.

I found the solution in this case by asking if anyone could come and help me tidy/clean/organize for pay on that facebook group, and I finally followed through on doing it after getting really frustrated with my own efforts last weekend taking HOURS for little payoff. (I was trying to put together a flat pack shelf that I ultimately decided was trash.)

I only got Sunday off this week, and I have to work both days next weekend, too. However, we get Monday and Tuesday off the following week. Still, for sanity and not becoming physically run-down, I might take a day off midweek. I hope nobody gets pissed off if I do since I am very often a pinch-hitter when other people don't show up.
conuly: (Default)
Listen…
With faint dry sound,
Like steps of passing ghosts,
The leaves, frost-crisp’d, break from the trees
And fall.


***


Link

Foster kitties 2

2025-11-15 00:50[personal profile] bunn
bunn: (Default)
They are still rather sleepy and sneezy and subject to minor goes of the runs, but they do seem more relaxed, have definitely put on weight - and they enjoy playing now. Apparently cat flu can last six weeks, and it's been 4, so I am still hoping for a full recovery.

Cut for photos )

(no subject)

2025-11-15 15:54[personal profile] author_by_night posting in [community profile] fictional_fans
author_by_night: (I really need a new userpic)
 Ao3's Sweet Sixteen is today! It was launched November 15th, 2009.
 
Were you an early adopter, or did it take you a while to start posting? Were you writing fanfic elsewhere at the time, or were you not into fic yet? How has your writing changed since the first fic you posted? Do you even use Ao3 now, or do you post somewhere else?
 
This post is not sponsored by Ao3. I'm just a dork.

Seeing things

2025-11-15 16:29[personal profile] mtbc
mtbc: maze M (white-blue)
I had thought it a good idea to choose glasses with fairly large lenses, figuring that I would have more of my visible field corrected. However, seeing as my distance vision is fine (though worse than it was in my youth), I find that it's not as practical for me to peer over the top of my glasses, I have to take them off or at least slide them down a bit. Well, now I know for next time I choose some. Additionally, another unanticipated effect of my choice is: having opted for rimless, if I put them down then it is harder to find them afterward.

I saw a surprising sight a while ago, commuting to work: travelling from west to east in the morning at a rather northerly latitude, at one point I noticed the sun on the left of the railway carriage. It turns out that, approaching Edinburgh, the more northerly railway line bends rather south for a spell before passing south of the airport instead of north of it.
conuly: (Default)
"Along the journey she discovers that her and her family were never actually slaves at all but the original royal family and the original slaves usurped the throne and took over due to constantly being oppressed and treated unfairly."

I really want to ask this person if they understand how the concepts of "slavery" and "royalty" work. This girl was definitely a slave because she was enslaved, you can be a slave and also be from a royal family since both these concepts are societal concepts, the word "usurp" suggests that this revolution was invalid and bad, and by the way, if she was born as part of the royal family she's probably lucky she wasn't killed, except that then the book would've been very short and grim, with no happy ending. Well, no happy ending for her, all the happy endings for the people who killed her family and secured their freedom.

(Somebody suggested this may be The Claidi Journals, which is what I was thinking.)

********************


Read more... )
james_davis_nicoll: (Default)
Outgunned's task resolution system involves rolling six-sided dice and looking for sets.

Some explanation behind a cut.

Read more... )
wychwood: Xena in front of a flaming building (XWP - death destroyer of worlds)
Annual leave is so nice but now I have to go back to work on Monday :(. On the other hand, I do still have a whole weekend first, even if it's relatively busy. The deacon trainee is being ordained acolyte and lector on Sunday and some of the training people showed up last weekend and Announced that we would be providing more servers than we actually have seats for and also a thurifer, and since I am presently the only thurifer available, I have to go. Truly I am punished for not having arranged the training I was supposed to be organising back in the spring before Mum got sick. Fortunately one of my four Sunday video calls has rescheduled so it's a slightly less ludicrous calendar than might have been the case.

Anyhow. I have done very little; read two turn-of-the-century novels (nineteenth to twentieth, that is), finally caught up with laundry after getting out of cycle while I was with Mum, got through the three Tablet issues I had waiting and started the one that arrived today, did the tragically overdue washing up, and went to the cinema to see The Choral. I enjoyed it! I would say it was a war story more than a choir story, but Gerontius is important to the plot and I did like what they did with it. And, much as I love superhero films, it's nice to see something that isn't one of the endless sequels, remakes, shared universes, etc etc, that make up most cinema these days.

I also progressed my ebook catalogue a bit - went through all my StoryBundle purchases, downloaded anything that wasn't on my phone and therefore in the catalogue already, and added them to the catalogue (along with the source) and the phone. Also added a sheet for audiobooks and put in the ones I've bought from libro.fm since I started my subscription. Next up would be the various Humble Bundles, which is a much larger number of bundles and piles of audiobooks as well as ebooks, so I've put that off until another week...
lydamorehouse: (Default)
 One really fun thing that I did lately is finally listen to/read The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde

This came about because my son has heard me go on and on since I read Frankenstein for the first time earlier this year about how GAY Victor Frankenstein was for his most sincere friend Henry Clevral. Being Mason, he said, "Oh, huh. Have you ever read Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde? I recommend it," without, of course, spoiling the fact that it's pretty much common knowledge the Robert Louis Stevenson had based Jekyll and Hyde on his real life gay friends.

If you doubt me, check out the Wikipediea entry's "inspiration and writing" section: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strange_Case_of_Dr_Jekyll_and_Mr_Hyde#Inspiration_and_writing  Stevenson apparently literally named Jykell after a reverand who was very likely gay and several of his known gay associates, specifically John Addington Symonds. Symonds apparently read Jekyll and Hyde and said (and I paraphrase), "I am in this book and I don't like it."

Anyway, The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde is short and well worth the read.

Having thoroughly enjoyed that experience, I have been pondering if there are other classics that I've ignored over the years due to the trauma of having been an English major. (When one is forced to read a lot of classic leterature, one grows weary of its ponderousness.)  My friend [personal profile] naomikritzer has talked me into trying out Anne of Green Gables. I'm not sure how well this one will stick because it is in no way genre or genre adjacent like Frankenstein and The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.  But, we'll see. I found someone on Spotify who did a lovely podcast of Anne of Green Gables with multiple voice actors playing the various roles, so it could generally just be a fun way to experience the book. 

I know it's not Wednesday, but what are you reading? Anything fun? Anything weird? Anything AWFUL?
swan_tower: (Default)
As you can imagine, this essay will continue with a frank discussion of genitalia and modifications to same.

A eunuch is generally understood to mean a man who has been castrated, i.e. whose testicles have been cut off. Sometimes, though, he has been fully emasculated -- meaning removal of the penis as well; this was usually the case with Chinese eunuchs -- while on other occasions, the term refers to any man who is unable to procreate (e.g. because of impotence or chemical castration), even if he is intact. Unsurprisingly, it can also be slung as an insult against a man, questioning his virility.

We probably got the idea of eunuchs from animal husbandry, where castration of males is common enough that we often have separate terms for the two types: steers vs. bulls, geldings vs. stallions. Among livestock, it brings a number of benefits to their human owners; castrated beasts are less likely to attack people or other males and less likely to break down fences to try and get at females, while the small number of reproductively capable individuals makes it easier to control the population size and arrange for advantageous breeding matches. Neutered animals, female as well as male, also tend to live noticeably longer.

Among humans, the physical effects are similar. The removal of the testicles generally reduces sexual desire and its associated behaviors, while preventing reproduction. If performed before puberty -- as it usually is with animals -- the subject's voice will remain high, he won't grow facial hair or develop male pattern baldness, he'll put on less muscle and retain more fat, and he may wind up tall and long-limbed, as castration interferes with the hormonal changes that stop bone growth. He also stands a good chance of living longer. Males castrated after puberty, by contrast, will generally keep the changes already experienced, though they too will not progress to baldness.

The social effects, though . . . those get very complicated.

Castration or emasculation can be a punishment, not only for the individual, but for the lineage they're no longer able to perpetuate. As such, in a society where a crime taints the whole family, a male criminal might be executed and his sons castrated, stopping the line in its tracks. We've also often seen it as a fitting consequence for sexual crimes -- a category that at times has unfortunately included being gay. Of course, reduction in sexual desire doesn't necessarily mean its elimination entirely, not all sexual crimes are driven by desire in the first place, and there are ways to rape people without functioning testicles (or even a penis). And while there's some evidence that castrated men are less likely to re-offend, it's too scant for us to be sure of a firm causal relationship. Still, in some jurisdictions, convicts are offered a choice between castration (surgical or chemical) followed by release from prison, and serving a longer sentence while keeping their bodies intact . . . and some of them do indeed choose the former.

On the other hand, castration has sometimes been a thing people voluntarily seek out. Transgender women, of course, may pursue it in the interests of bringing their bodies in line with their self-image. Historically, boys with particularly pure singing voices might either be castrated or undergo a procedure that made their testicles atrophy, so they would retain their childhood range into adulthood; where women were forbidden to sing, these castrati took their place in music. And then in certain places and times, becoming a eunuch could actually be a route to opportunity, wealth, and power.

Though our modern democratic societies tend not to think this way, in cultures more organized around lineages and inheritance, a man who can't procreate is seen as lacking the motivations that drive people to amass power for themselves, their heirs, and their broader kin groups -- meaning that he can be relied upon to serve the interests of his lord instead. In East Asia, eunuch officials were often seen as extensions of the king's or emperor's will, in contrast with scholar-officials who might oppose it. How true this was in reality, of course, depended on the rulers and the officials in question!

That's one kind of trustworthiness; another involves women. Unsurprisingly, eunuchs have also been trusted among sheltered female populations in ways that intact males were not. Probably the most common image of them in the West is as harem guards, because they were less likely to engage in sexual behavior with the women there, and incapable of siring children on them even if such transgressions happened. That's not inaccurate, but it's incomplete, as eunuchs served in a variety of domestic and bureaucratic roles related to such environments. They were the point of contact between male and female worlds, their own liminal status allowing them to cross over into both.

Liminal -- and in many cases, lowly. Eunuchs were commonly servants or even slaves (with castrated slaves sometimes fetching a higher price), and as many of us know from other contexts, high-ranking people easily fall into the trap of forgetting just how much the servants around them are overhearing. Assumed loyalty plus invisible ubiquity makes for a great combination: is it any wonder that eunuchs sometimes doubled as spies? Of course this was not without its dangers; a servant or slave can easily be executed if caught snooping, and that loyalty may not extend in both directions. Still, knowing everyone's secrets and passing them on to the right ears can be a route to power.

Eunuchs didn't only wield power from the shadows, though. In both the Muslim and Chinese worlds, they could also rise to incredibly high rank -- including military rank! The advantage of a eunuch general is that there's not much point in him staging a coup to overthrow the ruler: what's he going to do, start a dynasty that ends when he dies? Few people will flock to that usurper's banner, given that they want stability, not a new civil war a few years or decades down the line. (I do wonder how many of those eunuch military officials were castrated as adults instead of as boys. I suspect more of the former, as they would have the benefits of puberty-induced changes to their bodies -- useful if they're expected to fight personally, instead of just directing the soldiers -- but I don't know for sure.)

In speculative fiction, eunuchs have tended to serve precisely one role: to code a society as a certain kind of "decadent" court, usually modeled on something like Muslim caliphates or the Ottoman Empire. They guard harems, and that's it. But that's been changing a little of late, with characters like the spymaster Varys in George R.R. Martin's A Song of Ice and Fire or the general Ouyang in Shelley Parker-Chan's Radiant Emperor duology, which is historical fantasy set in the transition between the Chinese Yuan and Ming dynasties. Both of those characters are singular, rather than belonging to extensive traditions of eunuch service, but they both reflect genuine dynamics around the roles castrated men can fill that aren't guarding harems. I doubt we'll see a flood of eunuch characters in Anglophone fiction any time soon -- if only because it's a topic that tends to make a lot of male readers uncomfortable -- but it would be interesting to get some continued variety!

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(originally posted at Swan Tower: https://is.gd/3vKXuV)
prixmium: (vash arm)
I am the kind of person for whom general strokes spoilers don't bother me at all. In fact, my best friend is pretty correct that strategic, bullet point type spoilers for something make me more inclined to finish it or give it a shot in the first place.

The other day, she finished up the Amphoreus plot in Honkai Star Rail.

She's been playing HSR since launch, but she never tried to get me into it despite my being a slow but interested Genshin player until this plot came around.

I come and go with my ability to focus on even playing video games, but I love it so much.

Participating in a fic big bang earlier this year kind of hurt my confidence in a weird way that most other writing challenges have not. I don't know if it was just timing or what.

I really want my writing juice back. My daydream space seems to be coming back just a little bit, but so far I cannot make it shape anything that I can turn into something I can share. I'm creatively frustrated but maybe not as hopeless as I was. Hope it sticks.

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